My brain.

Lol I woke up with a dream this morning and I HAD TO BLOG IT.

I was on my way to uni and I was rushing so as always, I stepped the pedal and accelerated. I was moving really fast but THERE'S A MASSIVE JAM in front cos of the Bersih 2.0 road block. YES, I dreamt about the Bersih roadblock hahaha. So I couldn't brake in time but didn't crashed into any cars only scratched around 5 cars. So I kept on going and didn't even stop to check the scratches that I made to the other cars. One of the cars caught up to me and asked me to pull over cos all the other cars that I scratched demanded money for repairs or else they would go to the police station and report. So I went back to the accident place and all the cars were gone cos they had waited for so long. I thought "I'll go to the police station tomorrow to report, now I gotta head to uni". And I drove back to uni again. When I reached I WAS LATE FOR MY CRIMINAL PAPER!

In reality, Criminal was the first paper and I hadn't touch that subject yet cos I'm still concentrating on Contract. So I dreamt that I didn't study for Criminal at all and am gonna flunk this subject. I tried remembering the cases and all I could think of that time was Currie v Misa from Contract and R v Ahluwalia. Lol at least what I studied didn't go to waste ! I dreamt about the cases :)

So yeah, I'm really amazed by brain. The way it works, it's just bizarre. Everything that I see is stored in my brain without me realising and is replayed in my dreams. Which makes me wonder, how do you dream? As in, how is it that you're closing your eyes and there's images and scenes playing in your head like some sort of movie? I'm amazed really. Shall do a little research when I'm free :)

为什么放弃要这么难?

不是放弃难，而是你不要放弃而已。

Dreams.

So.. I dreamt about you this morning. And boy, does it feel real.

It started off with me, Irin, Yih Shan and another girl ( I think it was Larissa) and we went to this place which had a stage and two rooms lol. Irin had this huge crush on you and pakat with Yih Shan to hide me away so that I don't bump into you. So you came backstage and Yih Shan hid me into one of the rooms. Somehow, you managed to come into my room and you were shocked to see me there. And you sat down and we started talking. We talked and talked and talked and somehow you ask me if we could get back together. And of course I said yes lol.

And I really felt happy throughout the dream, we were holding hands again and chatting and laughing like how we used to. I even brought you back to Raub to meet my grandpa. As you started your car and was about to leave with me, Grandpa stopped us and even gave you some pork to bring back. HAHAHHA. Grandpa looked really happy to see his grandchild finally brought somebody back home. In the car, you asked me what shoe size I'm wearing and I said 7 or 8. The numbers 7 and 8 keep on running through my mind and then I WAS AWAKE cos the number 8 is the time I was suppose to wake up for class. Funny how the brain works eh?

But the dream really felt real, the way you laugh and the way my hand can touch your face. It really made me thought that this was actually happening.

真得日有所思 夜有所梦

Talked to you a few days back and I realized how much I miss talking to you. It's been some time since we talked and I'm glad that I initiated the conversation. It always felt so relaxing talking to you and you always have your way of making me laugh with your lame-ness. And the way you talk, it's somewhat special. You're the first person I know who uses all 3 languages in a conversation.

But.......
I somewhat forgot how you sound like, it's been 3 years since I last spoken to you. And I forgot how tall I am next to you and how small my hand is compared to yours. The last time we measured, my hand was only half of yours and your big body always made me felt safe when I am with you. And I always loved how you would stand in front of me when we're going down the escalator and behind me when we're going up so that I won't 走光. Aww :)

And there was a show on TV the other day featuring these two singers and I stayed tune cos that guy on the left looked a lot like you.

Gahh.. I SHOULD REALLY STOP THINKING ABOUT YOU AND START FOCUSING ON MY EXAMS NEXT MONTH!

That Lucky Girl

You know what I'm really afraid of ?

I'm afraid that you'll eventually find a girlfriend.

cos

Then I would not have a shot of getting you back.

I know you.

You never couple up that easily.
You'll find for that ONE girl that you really have feelings for,
And you'll give your all and never let go until she does.

I've once been THAT girl.

And I've been one heck of a lucky girl for getting to be with you .

I still thought I had put you behind.
I still thought I had no more feelings for you, only fond memories.
I still thought I'm better off without you.

But no.

Whenever I see your posts on Facebook, I can't help but click on your name to keep updated with your life.
You've changed so much from the time I last saw you.

Now,
You no longer have your boyish charm, but you've grown to be a man.
You were no longer tall and skinny, now you're big and buff.

And

You no longer had any more feelings for me.

I guess God have His way of helping me forget about him too.
I try hard to preserve whatever that is left of him,
Pictures, videos, texts, gifts, comments on Friendster.
All of them are gone. I don't know how but I managed to lose all of them.
Reformated the computer without saving a backup copy of your pictures and viedos, lost my sim card with all your texts in it, misplaced the only gift from you, and Friendster HAD to delete my comments.

I remember how I use to cry when I know you were leaving for National Service cos then I won't get to spend time with you.
The long phone calls with you till 3 in the morning, pouring our hearts out, two people very much in love with each other.
And yet when we meet each other, we will just sit there without talking, not wanting to disturb the silence between us for we are content being in each others' arms.

From "The Notebook" by Nicholas Sparks:

It seems only the old are able to sit next to one another and not say anything and still feel content. The young, brash and impatient, must always break the silence. It is a waste, for silence is pure. Silence is holy. It draws people together because only those who are comfortable with each other can sit without speaking. This is the great paradox.

I don't know what I will get writing all of this things about you. I just needed a place to let out my thoughts, to tell the world how much I still love you today. Yet, I do not have the guts to tell you in the face, for I cannot face the truth, of you telling me that you've moved on and what I'm gripping on now are only bits and pieces of the past.

I'm glad to say that FINALS ARE FINALLY OVER ! After 3 weeks of tormented loneliness, I can finally go out. Urghh.. The only sad thing was I have nobody to go out with. Hahahhaha sad case lah me.

My day today was quite eventful, if going for movies and bitching about people over lunch is interesting to you that is. =D

Today was fun lah. Woke up like 6.30 and just stone there on the bed till 7am lol. Chemistry haven't even finish reading still got time to stone. So yeah. Studied like shit till 10am and off to makan and exam.

Huiyoh throughout the whole exam, the guy next to me was so freaking nervous. If he wasn't snapping his fingers, he'd be tapping his feet on the floor or just simply sighing.

Gosh.. And I was so sleepy and keep on getting distracted that I had to go toilet and look at the mirror and tell myself : You only get to do this exam once. It's either you screw it or you can make the best out of it.

So I went back, look at the paper with full determination and SHIT, I dont know how to do =( Left a few questions blank and the seconds were ticking by and then "Times up. Please stop writing. Any writing now will be considered as an act of cheating. Please check that you have written your ID number on each booklet. Invigilators will collect your paper now"

Then we went out of the hall and hugged each other cos YOU KNOW WHAT FINALS IS FRIGGIN' OVER ! My class people were like jumping around and off to Sunway Pyramid we go !

So me and Iri sat in Beng Kiat's car. Beng Kiat ah, I tell you ah. Damn impatient one loh. Keep on scolding people all the way from SS15 to the parking lot. See bump, never stop one. Change lane, no need worry one, he think people will let him cross. Gosh he was so impatient I scared that he would like take out a tukul and just hit people with it.

Nevermind, find parking space edi walk in and started walking towards Carl's Jr.

Problem, don't know where's Carl's Jr.

So Iri was saying " Hey, I think is this side."

Beng Kiat " No is the right side. You think a guy from USJ that come Pyramid every day since he born know the way better or a Klang girl where the distance from Pyramid to Klang is so far will know better? "

And there he goes, the impatient-ness booming out of him again. Lol. I think I should like buy him a book "How to be more patient in life"

So yeah, went Carl's Jr. and bitch bout people in college and decided to head for movies. Too bad that only me and Carol went to watch only though.

We went in late so it was like pitch black inside. Then somebody shouted "Carol !" and Carol was like, " I hear people calling my name" and then the whole movie stopped not because of Carol but because there's some fault happening in the machine.

So the light was on and BOOM every SAM student was there lol. Lily and her classmates and my own classmates all watching the same movie, You Again.

Then came home and turned on Facebook. I was so full of adrenaline rush then but there's nobody to teman me go out !! Sad case sad case. Guess that's so single people go about with their life. So spammed my own Facebook wall and chatted with Steph and became the love guru for an hour. Lol. Put all my energy into typing furiously on the keyboard, now I barely have any energy left.

But tmr we're going shopping ! Woohooo !! Can't wait =D

Good night people

♥

Song lyrics.

I believe the best way to convey a message is through a song.

Example : I'll have to say I love you in a song - Jim Croce



Free MP3 Downloads at MP3-Codes.com

And also, lyrics, they are interesting. If you listen real hard they mean a whole lot of things. Like Love the way you lie - Rihanna feat Eminem where they play with words.
Now you get to watch her leave
Out the window
Guess that's why they call it window pane
Lol. Interesting eh ?
And then there's some song lyrics that I can totally relate to :

From When You're Gone - Avril Lavigne :

When you walk away

I count the steps that you take

Do you see how much I need you right now ?

When I just broke up about two years back. I did exactly the same thing ( well, not exactly. I just did a whole bunch of stalking and crying =D )

From Go - Boys Like Girls : Get up and go
Take a chance and be strong
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
Don't look back; just go
Take a breath, move on
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
You could spend your whole life holding on

Believe the tunnel can end
Believe your body can mend
Yeah, I know you can make it through
'Cause I believe in you
So let's go put up a fight
Let's go make everything all right
Go on take a shot
Go give it all you got

This was when I was at my lowest, without any faith and confidence, the lyrics truly inspired me.
From Pyramid - Charice :Earthquakes can't shake us
Cyclones can't break us
Hurricanes can't take away our love
When I fell in love ♥

From Teenage Dream - Katy Perry :

You think I'm pretty
Without any make-up on
You think I'm funny
When I tell the puch line wrong
I know you get me
So I'll let my walls come down, down

When I was in love still ♥

And then there's this.
From Love the Way You Lie :You don't get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game
Maybe that's what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
I guess everybody has the same feeling whether it is break ups or love.